Astraphobia
by Iamthecookieninja
Summary: Takane has always been scared of thunderstorms, and Haruka has always kept his promises.


Takane had a fear. A fear she only let Haruka know. A fear she only let Haruka comfort.

But Haruka is no longer here

* * *

_"Haruka, I'm scared."_

_Our two figures were huddled in the corner of the classroom as the thunderstorm struck._

_I knew it was a bad idea to stay in to finish off our shooting game, but what else was a pair of sick teenagers meant to do when the culture festival was tomorrow and that useless sensei left us to rot?_

_I buried my face into his chest, not caring about our position for now even though I knew he would tease me about it later tomorrow. Haruka said nothing as he patted my back gently._

_"Haruka I'm scared of thunderstorms"_

_I felt Haruka still as I voiced out my confession and waited for him to connect the dots. The reason why I always muttered about something to do when the rain was heavy, why I kept hitting him every time he mentioned that it could storm that night. I waited for him to laugh at me, like Shintaro would, or push me away, thinking I was some weird-ass trying to find an excuse to hug him._

_He didn't. If anything he hugged me tighter._

_"It's okay, I'll protect you"_

_I stiffened at his reply, momentarily forgetting about the storm, my voice was shaky as I tested his oath._

_"Promise?"_

_For a split second, I realised how stupid my request was, Haruka was the one who needed protecting, not me, but my fear kept me from taking it back._

_Haruka's mouth was set in an uncharacteristic grim line as he sealed his oath._

_"Promise."_

* * *

My eyes snapped open as I heard a rumble of thunder in the distance, the clock above my head indicated that it was half past eleven, ticing away monotonously. Please, I clutched my sheets between my fingers, don't come yet, not tonight, not ever. I could feel a slight nausea in my stomach as I heard the rain steadily getting heavier, promising a thunderstorm.

A cold sweat ran down my back, I hadn't felt this way in a long time, I've almost forgotten what it's like to be scared again, Luckily, God was here to remind me.

Flashes of lightning danced in the distance, slowly but surely, the storm was approaching the Dan's headquarters. The "occasional" rumble of thunder became "frequently" and the "sometimes" flashes of lightning soon turned into "often".

_"Haruka, I'm scared of thunderstorms"_

I trembled as I gripped my sheets tighter, remembering that day I the classroom.

_"It's okay Takane, I'll protect you"_

"You lied"

My eyes were getting blurry as my throat was choked with...something. The clock kept ticking above my head.

_"Promise?"_

"You're a liar, Haruka"

My shirt was pulverized between my shaking fingers as I felt something crack inside me.

_"Promise."_

"You lied to me"

All of a sudden, my grief flowed into anger, anger that Takane, not Ene had. Stupid bastard, why didn't he keep his promise? My nails dug into my palm, drawing blood from the rough cuts that it left. I wanted to hit something, I wanted to kill who ever put me in this situation. The thunder boomed outside, I was still scared, but anger was now a source of energy for me. Haruka made a promise, and he was going to keep it.

I sat up from my bed.

"_Promise"_

I walked to my door and flung it open.

"_Promise"_

My footsteps were eerily quiet on the tile floors as I approached my destination.

"_Promise"_

My hand trembled as it rested on Konoha's bedroom handle.

**He fucking promised**

And I turned the knob.

* * *

"_Hey…Haruka."_

_Our figures created a dark silhouette across the park as the sun set. Two teenagers enjoying each other's company, one happily munching away at an ice pole, and another with a slight unease gnawing at her heart_

"_Yes, Takane?"_

_Haruka looked at me inquiringly, wondering what was it that distracted him from his food as he looked up from his ice pole._

_I fidgeted nervously as I began my question. _

"_Don't forget me. Like ever, okay?" _

_The boy next to me was silent, the food in his hand forgotten. My heart sank at his response._

"_It doesn't matter, nothing happ –"_

_I was cut off abruptly as Haruka spoke again in a surprisingly upbeat voice._

"_How could I ever forget Takane?" He stared laughing._

"_Then promise me-"_

_Haruka waved away at my request, his smile only growing bigger_

"_I don't need something like a promise to remember Takane"_

_A felt my cheeks grow warm as he spoke, melting away my irrational fears._

"_Whatever"_

* * *

I flung open the door, having full intention beat the living shit out of the person lying underneath the covers of his blankets. A mop of pale hair was visible from underneath the sheets. I raised my hand, but for some reason I couldn't bring it down onto the sleeping body.

_Stupid Takane, what the hell are you doing?_

I wanted to scream, the anger was being replaced by frustration. Why the hell was god doing this to me? Did he think it was funny? The jagged scratches on my hand were still bleeding. All I wanted was for him to remember, hell, he didn't even have to like me back.

_I should have made him promise_

The thought was hollow and empty, as if I just missed a train I would never catch again, I almost laughed at that. A train that I would never catch again sounds a lot like my situation with Haruka right now.

It's so lonesome, spending days wearing a smile and nights screaming into my pillow. I've already given up trying to make him remember. I've endured this unrequited love for two years. _Two years_. I know it's time to stop.

But I still can't.

_I just can't._

My breathing hitched as I saw his form turn in his bed, terrified that he might've woken up.

_Oh my god don't wake up please please please_

I let out a sigh of relief when I saw his frame relax back into the mattress. He hasn't woken up, Thank god.

Somewhere, I knew that god was smirking down at me from heaven, probably laughing his ass off about how worked I was being.

_Fricken god_

What was I even doing here? Oh. Wait. Yeah. I had an emotional breakdown and ended up in some guys' room. Whoops. The storm outside was building up, lightning crackled outside threateningly as I clamped my hands over my ears. Stupid storm. Leave me alone already.

And why was I still in Konoha's bedroom?

I stood up to leave, careful to tread quietly on the creaky wooden floorboards. I didn't need Konoha waking up to find me in his room, in the middle of the night, none the less. As I reached for the handle on the door, I heard a soft mumble that made me stop cold.

"Takane..." Konoha's whisper was fervent "I want to see you again"

My heart nearly stopped just by hearing him say my name again. My real name. My fingers turned white as I gripped the handle tighter. I felt long repressed tears prickling at the edge of my eyes. My hand fell from the door knob.

Stupid Takane, the logical side of me thought, get your act together you idiot and stop staring at him like some perv, he's not Haruka anymore.

Shut up my less-than-logical-side thought back, which unfortunately, was most of me.

Lightening crackled outside, signalling the storms' arrival.

Shit, I was too late.

I could feel the hysteria bubbling up as I tried to force it down again, it was coming at the worst of times, I was in somebody else's bedroom for goodness sake. Another rumble of thunder passed and my knees were shaking, my legs giving out from underneath them as I hit the ground, my hands covering my ears. The storm has only just begun.

The fear were coming up my throat like vomit, choking me. Please, not now I don't need this now I thought desperately. The thunderstorm was already in full force, I pressed my palms to the sides of my head tighter. My breath was becoming more and more erratic, I was suffocating, taking deep breaths even though nothing was choking me.

My head shot up when I heard a creak. Konoha was lifting himself off his bed as he stared at me through hazy eyes, struggling to comprehend what was happening as he ran a hand through his hair, probably wondering if I was going to rape him or give him food

"E...ne?"

Wonderful, he hasn't asked what the heck I was doing in his room, but he's looking at me like I'm some new species of pedophile. So much better. The situation would have been almost funny if it wasn't happening to me.

Remind me to kill myself.

Another crackle of thunder resounded in the room inciting a muffled shriek to tear itself from my throat as an unknown wetness ran down my cheeks. I touched it gingerly.

Was I...crying?

No way...

During my nightmares I could scream, shriek, swear my lungs out to the point of hysteria, but I never cried. Takane never cried over anything, not nightmares and especially not in front of someone else. My self value dropped another couple of notches.

"Is Ene crying?"

No, I'm just sweating through my eyeballs, don't mind me. I half smiled through my tears, despite all this, my inner cynic couldn't help itself.

"I'm fine"

My eyes widened as he slipped out between his sheets- landing on the ground gracefully, and to my utter horror, started advancing towards me, for every step he took forward, I pushed myself back, unfortunately, Konoha's oh-so-considerate corner decided to block me off from retreating any further as soon as Konoha took his third step. _Stupid corner, I'm gonna graffiti all over you next time we meet._

Too late, Konoha squatted down in front of me in the darkness, one arm resting on the wall, blocking my path to freedom and another timidly wrapped around my waist, his forehead touching my own.

"Wha..."

Konoha bored his magenta eyes into mine, freezing me to the very pit of my soul.

"Takane is crying" his voice was husky as his warm breath hit my face.

A crash of thunder broke the eye contact, I tried to muffle a squeak between my lips as I instinctively hugged his torso, trying to find even a tiny piece of Haruka from all those years ago.

_The years he didn't remember_

My eyes watered as I tightened my hold on his form. The tears were flowing freely by now, I buried my face a little deeper in his chest every time I heard thunder boom outside.

"I'm scared, Haruka" my voice barely above a whimper.

"I'm scared, I'm really, really scared, Haruka" It was like a dam had burst open and the flood waters were escaping through the cracks, I was venting out all the pressure that I had endured up till now, my promise to Ayano, pretending for Shintaro's sake, being forgotton by Haruka, everything.

"Shhh...It's alright, it's alright...Ene" Hesitantly, Konoha ran his slender fingers through my matted hair, unsure of what to do in this sort of situation.

_"_Don't call me Ene!" I hated that name, the name that others said, the ones who didn't know the real me, not Haruka. "Just call me Takane... like before...before..."

I let loose all the emotions that had built up over the years; the dam that had been carefully constructed was broken tonight, relieved in hysterical sobs that racked my body with all it had left.

"Just don't call me Ene...Haruka."

I don't care if what I'm doing is wrong. _I just didn't give enough of a shit anymore. _

"Haruka, Haruka, Haruka", the words kept spilling out of my mouth as the storm carried on, by now I was too broken, too emotionally shattered to care if he didn't remember me anymore, he was here.

_He was here_

"Please," Konoha winced as I mumbled a name that was no longer his. "It's Konoha"

"Haruka, Haruka" I barely noticed his plead as my wailing didn't cease.

"I'm really scared Haru-"

I was cut off as Konoha prised me from his chest and shoved me against the corner, his face inches apart from mine, I could feel his breath hitting my face and I was vaguely aware that his fingers were still intertwined in my hair. His usually dispassionate pink eyes now- for the first time, held some sort of savage desperation in it. It may only have been a glimpse, but it was enough to make me stop cold.

"Please" Konoha's lips were dangerously close to my own, faintly pink and getting closer, the distance getting smaller as I could do nothing, slightly entranced by this new side of Konoha I was seeing. Lightning flashed to create a shadow across his face, his voice low and tinted with anger unlike his usual monotone.

"I don't like you saying that other guys' name"

He was getting closer as the space between us was reduced rapidly.

Two centimetres

One centimetre

Half a centimetre...

_No. No, stop, I don't want this-_

Our lips met, it wasn't passionate and demanding, but rather soft and gentle, as if I were something delicate, as opposed to his attitude to me before the kiss. I was drugged with the sweetness of it as I clumsily kissed back, my lips meshing with his. He wrapped his arms around me tighter as the storm was beginning to reach its climax.

I didn't know how long it lasted for, or how long it took for me to fully realise what I was doing, but I kept doing it. The storm outside now pushed to the back of my mind. At one point a particularly loud boom thundered outside, I flinched and tried to push him away, but in response he clutched me tighter to himself, as if he was afraid of what would happen after the kiss was over.

When we finally broke apart, I was pretty sure both our faces were flushed. He leaned in again, trying to score another kiss as I shoved him away. Anger bubbled up, replacing fear when it fully daunted with me how I had just been played with. Nobody plays around with Takane's feelings. _Nobody_. Unfortunately Haruka- or Konoha now was the exception to that rule, which was why he got away with only a shove in the first place.

"What the _hell_ do you think you're doing?" the tone of my voice was enough to snap Konoha back into his senses.

"Oh, sorry" he was back to using his bland tone, his unapologetic bland tone

I was on the verge of snapping and hurling Konoha out of his own room, Sorry? That's it? Now I could see that he really was Haruka in another form, both possessed that certain quality of annoyingness that made me stuck between wanting to kill either them or myself. I was contemplating on taking a step further from just merely wanting to hurl Konoha out of his own room when two things stopped me.

One, Haruka, or Konoha, was a lot stronger than before which means I probably can't even lift him up, much less hurl him out of the room.

Two, It was, as much as I disliked it, Konoha's room.

So I settled for chewing him out, just like the old days, my previous fear of storms now pushed to the back of my head.

"Sorry? Sorry?! Are you frickin kidding me? You can't just go around kissing people like a pedophile, you...Idiot!"

My lack of understanding of the Japanese language prevented me from using more effective curses. Outside, the thunderstorm was receding as the rain grew heavier, pounding on the glass windows. My fear disappearing with the storm.

Konoha didn't seem fazed by my words; in fact I swear I could see a hint of a smile tugging at his lips.

"But Takane kissed back...so she must have liked it, right?"

He asked hopefully, as if he were a little kid. I'm pretty sure if I wasn't blushing already before, I sure as hell was now.

"No, I just-Arrgh! You're so annoying!"

I turned my head away to hide my embarrassment of getting caught out. Who knew Konoha could be so perceptive? Not that I liked him or anything. I was just emotionally unstable when I saw Haruka die in my dreams. I felt nothing for this guy. Totally. Just a bit psychologically insecure. Like for a moment. I'm fine now.

Pssh, why are you looking at me like that?

My thoughts were interrupted by a thoughtful looking Konoha.

"I think...I like the real Takane better then the smiling one."

Konoha was blushing slightly. Or he had too many wasabi flavoured peas before he went to bed. The latter seemed more likely. I tilted my head as the meaning of what he was saying gradually sunk in.

My lips twitched into a small smile.

"Yeah, yeah, whatever."

Despite my reply, I still couldn't get rid of that goddamn smile. It was still planted on my face, happy as ever, and it seems like Konoha realised it too, because he kept pressing on.

"But...Can Takane...only show it to me...?"

My heart felt all weird and warm in my chest, like it was trying to jump out. I shook my head, this shouldn't be happening to me, especially not around him, the only person I've felt like this for was Haruka.

_Which is Konoha in another form, dumbass_

_Shut up, I knew that_

Oh great, now I'm going nuts arguing with myself. Smart, aren't I?

"Yeah, whatever, not like I care"

I turned my head away. Dammit, my heart has to stop doing these jumpy things; it wasn't Haruka I was talking to anymore. Jeez.

Konoha brightened visibly, until we both heard a bird cooing in the distance, signalling my queue to leave. An awkward silence passed. Or maybe I was the only one that could feel the awkwardness, I'm pretty sure that Konoha wasn't _designed_ to feel anything.

"Sorry for going into your room like that" I said gruffly "I'm scared of thunderstorms"

Konoha titled his head to the side, I was thankful that he didn't try to pry and ask why, I don't think I would be able to take it.

"Oh, okay then" the silence that followed was suffocating "Goodni-"

"Wait" I interrupted suddenly, on the spur of the moment "Do you remember anything from your past life? Anything at all?"

He was first surprised at the question but he quickly got over the shock. He nodded slowly, unsurely, his face scrunched up in concentration.

"I remember a girl...and a shooting game...? I think she was important to me, but I can't remember her face clearly."

He shook his head sheepishly.

"Sorry, it gets a little better every day but for now that's all I can remember."

I smiled. My first genuine smile in ages, not the ones I showed around Shintaro and the others to let them know I was fine, a true smile.

"It's okay then, but when you remember, can you tell me?"

Konoha nodded again, confused.

"But why do-"

My smile vanished in an instant.

"It doesn't matter" I snapped "Goodnight"

I whirled around to slam the door as I stormed off to my room, my feet treading quickly and stealthily to not make a noise on the floors that I had tred on earlier.

Across the hallway, the door to my room greeted me. I pushed it open and slammed it behind me, my back leaning on it for support as I slid down its smooth surface. The events of before sunk in to my mind.

He kissed me

I touched my lips gingerly, the feeling of his own pressing on mine still lingered. I felt a blush creep up onto my face and I knew it was going to stay there for a long time.

Oh. My. God.

* * *

Little did Takane know, that across the hallway, Konoha was lying wide awake on his bed, and for the first time in his life- thinking the same thing.

Neither of them got much sleep that night

* * *

Yes. I know. That was very, very crappy. It took me 3 days to write and 1 month to edit and IT'S STILL SO SHIT LIKE I CAN'T EVEN-

Ahem. Yes I know I couldn't keep them in character very well and it was sorta my first kiss scene. Ugh, it's just so WEIRD.

But I posted it for you guys, my small amount of fans, yes I mean you, akaoisora and you, Dayum, and you too mew sunset star...and all of my reviewers. Thank you so very, very much.

(Raises glass of Ribena) So here's to my second fanfiction! /clink/


End file.
